Tag Archives: Love

Loving Hurt.

I’ve always heard and maintained the philosophy that sometimes you’ve gotta play hurt.  In other words, sometimes, you’ve got to play and give and serve even when you don’t feel like playing and giving and serving.  But, quite frankly, we usually WANT to play even though we are hurt.  Most athletes will continue to play their game hurt, because they are passionate about that game.  So, it’s not really that much of a sacrifice.  I mean, I’m no athlete, but I do have some pretty awesome running apparel that I wear to carpool little people. 

The real sacrifice comes in loving hurt. 

Kris is my safe place.  He is the one who understands when I don’t feel like giving or serving.  He’s the one who loves me no matter what.  That being said, it’s pretty dang easy to bow out on serving him when I’m physically or mentally exhausted or hurting.  Besides, he understands.

And, with my recent back injury, I was little good to anyone, and Kris served me without a single complaint.  He’s good like that.  He’s compassionate and understanding.  He does, however, fail to understand how accessories really do make the wardrobe.  I know, right?

But, it hit me a few days ago.

Sometimes, you’ve got to love hurt. 

I’m not just talking about loving in spite of the proverbial headache.  Well, sort of, I am.  I am talking about stepping outside of yourself. 

Outside off your physical pain. 

Outside of your emotional pain. 

Outside of your exhaustion. 

Outside of your broken heart.  

Outside of your stuff.   

And, choosing to love hurt. 

I was really tired the other night.  (It’s okay.  You can keep reading.  This doesn’t get graphic.  This is a family blog.)  I had the worst headache of all the headaches in the world.  (And, I never exaggerate.)   I looked at my husband lying beside me and this little revelation hit me:  love hurt.  So, I rubbed his back….  And, we will just leave it at that, friends.   

At that moment, I sure would have loved to fall asleep watching House Hunters and nurse my headache.  But, I knew I needed to choose him this time.  I knew I needed to love hurt. 

You see, often, the person we love the most is the person we serve the least. 

For me, it was my physical pain keeping me from loving hurt.  For you, it might be a different kind of hurt.  Loving hurt for you may look like having to forgive while hurt.  It might be loving even though your feelings are hurt.  Loving even though you are disappointed.  Loving even though you are mentally exhausted and feel like you just can’t take any more. 

Loving even though….

Because, when we do love hurt, that love never returns void.  It is never without effect.

Because, love never, ever fails. 

And, that is one certainty I know with all of my heart.

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Filed under life, Love, Relationships

She Is Still Anna Takle.

“I love the way I look,” she declared staring at her new clothes in the mirror before church on Sunday morning.

She insisted the scarf and purse were necessary “accessories” to complete her look.  I had obliged and made the shopping trip about her. 

“I want you to like the way you look.  I want you to feel good about how you look.  But, always be careful not to tell everyone how fabulous you think you look.  It’s not a good character trait,” I told her.

“Oh, right.  It’s kind of like being proud,” she agreed.

“Proud?”

“Yes.  It says in Corinthians that love is not proud.  It is patient, kind, it isn’t jealous, it isn’t proud, and a bunch of other stuff,” she told me.

She gets it!  She is learning to apply scripture to everyday life!  I couldn’t be more thrilled! 

After church was over, her teacher, Mrs. Layna, took a picture of a note Anna wrote to her that day and sent it to me.

So, she may not apply every scripture to her life.  Of course, neither does her momma.

She is still the determined, creative, and fun girl God created her to be.  She is still Anna Takle. 

And, I’m so glad she is.

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Filed under Kid Stuff, Motherhood, parenting, Virtue

My Funny Valentine.

Me:  Kris, you never complain about anything.

Kris:  It’s because I have a closer walk with God.

Not only is my sweet husband a contented non-complainer, he’s also very funny.  He knew he would make me laugh with his explanation of why he doesn’t complain.  Kris has an incredible ability to not let things really get to him.  He also has quite the propensity to make me laugh every day we are together. 

But, it’s his capacity to let things go….

To let hurts go.  To overlook people’s faults.  To forgive without hesitation….

It’s one of the things I love about him most. 

How often we think we cannot get over a hurt or an offense.  We internalize and dwell on them.  We want vengeance.  We want that person to know exactly how we feel.  Exactly how they’ve hurt us.  We want to hold them accountable for their words and actions. 

But, that’s just not God’s way. 

God’s way is to think of others as better than ourselves – Philippians 2:3.

God’s way is to be kind to one another and tenderhearted, forgiving them as quickly and fully as God forgave us – Ephesians 4:32.

God’s way is to never avenge ourselves – Romans 12:19.

God’s way is to love our enemies – Matthew 5:44.

God’s way is unconventional.  His way was to go to a cross and never open His mouth even to defend Himself.  His way was to take communion on the same night he was betrayed. 

The. Same. Night.

Now, Kris Takle is no saint, I tell ya.  And, he might confuse a scripture or ten, albeit, sometimes purposefully, because he knows it’ll make me laugh.  But, he gets that God’s way stuff on letting things go pretty dadgum good. 

Kris, thank you for being such an incredible example of God’s love.  You continue to inspire and push me to do things God’s way while still giving me room to grow.  I might be able to quote 1 Corinthians 13 in my sleep, but, you walk it out with such greater ease. 

You’re a good man.  And, a really fun Valentine. 

Happy Valentine’s Day, y’all.  Now, go love on somebody.

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Filed under God Stuff, Love, Marriage

Who You Are.

Apparently, I am not a Libra.  And, you are not who you think you are either.  In case you missed the overnight changes in Astrology, you can read about it here.  Honestly, I am not a follower of my sign, and I’m not about to debate its legitimacy with you.  A) I’m not that smart.  B)  I really don’t care.  ALL of this to share a funny text conversation with my foxy pilot:

Me:  “You’re not a Scorpio any more.  You’re a Libra!”

Kris:  “How come?  Was I born in a different month, and my momma lied?” 

Me:  “No. The Zodiac signs shifted and changed last night.”

Kris:  “Says who?  The Zodiac Czar?”

Me:  “You are all of the Zodiac signs to me, babe.”

Kris:  “Well, I hope I’m still an Ox at the Chinese restaurant.”

I swear he makes me laugh ALL OF THE TIME. 

On a more serious note.  Some of you really aren’t who you think you are.  After yesterday’s post, I was flooded with e-mails and messages from many of you asking me to pray for you. 

I did.  And, my prayers for you did not cease last night.  When I commit to pray for you, I really do.

I can’t tell you what it did to my heart to read your hurts.  Your fears.  Your struggles.  Your what ifs.  I think what broke me most were the few who really don’t see that God wants good things for them.  And, that God’s promises are as much for them as the next person.

So, some of you really aren’t who you think you are. 

But, you ARE who GOD says you are.  And, He says He loves you so much that He watched His son suffer for you.  He says you are so valuable to Him that He knows how many hairs are on your head.  He says you are such the apple of His eye that He pursues you Himself. 

He LOVES you.  And, there is nothing you can do to change that. 

May we all run after Him the way He runs after us. 

And, have a GREAT weekend.

6 Comments

Filed under God Stuff, Marriage, Say What?

Some Greek to Help With Peeps.

Soooo, how DO we respond to people who hurt us? 

We are patient with them.

Wha?  Patient?  What in the Sam Hill does patience have to do with it? 

Well, I’m glad you asked.  Two Greek words translate into the English word “patience.”  One is “hupomone.”  It means to “remain under.”  This is the patience we talk about when we are enduring tough circumstances.  But, circumstances are not people.  Oh, no. 

The Greek word, “makrothumia” is the sort of patience we need with people.  Bear with me.  Or, be PATIENT with me.  Ha!

Guess what drives makrothumia?  Give up?

MERCY.

Remember yesterday’s story of the king forgiving the servant’s debt?  He FORGAVE that debt.

Again, stay with me.

So, we first have to FORGIVE.

My good friend, Beth Moore, says,   “Patience is the vessel through which God pours His mercy.  Mercy is fueled by forgiveness.”

Okay, let’s just pretend Beth is my good friend. 

When we forgive, we let go free.  We let go of our power.  We cut that person loose.  They no longer owe us a thing.

Sometimes, I think that I have a right to hold this grudge or be angry….and, every right to be merciless.  But, God’s word calls us to forgive.  Who wants to carry the burden of unforgiveness?  The plus side?   When we forgive, God can be released to work the situation to our good.  And, don’t even think you can do it on your own.  You can’t.  That’s what the HS is for. 

Besides, the opposite of patience is judgment.  But, that’s another post for another day.

You see, the patience God desires for us to extend to others is the same patience that meant the salvation of our soul.

That’s all I’m sayin’. 

And, I hope I am CONSTANTLY reminded of this kind of patience….this kind of mercy….this kind of forgiveness…..

Until I love people CONSTANTLY.

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Filed under God Stuff, Love, Relationships, Spiritual Journey

I’m A New Wife! Again!

I’ve never really considered myself the nagging wife. 

Until, I recently realized I had become a nagging wife.

What?  Me?  Yes!  Me!

I’m married to a pilot man.  You know this.  I started noticing that when he was out and about burning holes in the skies, I missed him.  I didn’t miss what he does for me while he’s here.  Just the person, Kris Takle.  My husband.  A sweet kind of miss.  The kind where you send the sweetest text messages and say the sweetest things on the phone. 

Well, this doesn’t sound like nagging.  Of course, it doesn’t. 

Enter nagging.

Pilot man comes home.  I forget how much I missed him and focus on his flight bag on our bedroom floor.  Unpacked.  Then, I notice how we need to spruce up our landscaping.  And, I notice that he doesn’t notice this.  And, his laptop on my kitchen counter?  Really? 

Pick.  Pick.  Pick. 

I fail to notice a husband who tells me how beautiful I am.  I fail to notice a man who desires me, encourages me, and builds me up.

Why?  Because, I’m so focused on what he’s not doing, I am blurring everything good out.

I recognize this in myself.  I hate this in myself.  I hate that I am doing this to the man I love.  To the man who loves me.  So, I tell him.  We talk it out.  And, make a commitment to stop.

Stop the nagging.  Stop the complaining.  Stop noticing what he doesn’t do or see.

So, what if it takes me an extra twenty minutes a day to clean up a little more after him?  What’s twenty minutes?  Or, what if I just resolve that his laptop on the kitchen counter is okay?  And, his unpacked bag can wait? 

What if?

My marriage will be better, because, I’m not selling out to small foxes.  And, that sweet miss for him when he is gone will be even sweeter when he returns home. 

I will be happier.  He will be happier.  And, our love will stay sweeter. 

I’m not exactly sure how this pattern of behavior began for me.  But, I am definitely sure that it needed to end.  Because, I am blessed.  And, I LOVE that man.

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Filed under Love, Marriage

Put Yo Coat On!

I’m reading through the book of Colossians this week.  In the following passage, Paul encourages us to “clothe ourselves” in these God qualities:

 12 Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. 13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 14 Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. 15 And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.  16 Let the message about Christ, in all its richness, fill your lives. Teach and counsel each other with all the wisdom he gives. Sing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs to God with thankful hearts.  17 And whatever you do or say, do it as a representative of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks through him to God the Father.  Colossians 3:12-17

If you leave your house without putting on this coat of mercy, kindness, humility, et cetera, et cetera, you leave your house naked.  (Pronounced “nekked.”) 

Since every member of my little family has appointed himself or herself “The Accountability Authority,” it is impossible to get away with taking off this coat.  So, when we behave or respond in a manner that fails to demonstrate those above God qualities, we simply tell, okay yell, “You bettah put yo coat on!” 

It usually diffuses whatever is causing the nakedness and keeps us accountable to clothe ourselves in these qualities that, let’s face it, make us better people. 

Mercy.  Kindness.  Humility.  Gentleness.  Patience.  Forgiveness.  Love.  Peace.  These really make life better and so much easier. 

So, before you go out around people today, put yo coat on!

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Filed under God Stuff, Love, Relationships, Spiritual Journey