Once upon a time at a wedding of my dear friend, Brittany, my son served as a ring bearer. Dressed to perfection, another overheard him say, “I have two daddies.” Brittany’s friend who heard this rather common phenomenon asked another, “Are his daddies gay?” I still laugh about this even today. As for Kris and Bryan (the daddies), well, they find it less comical.
John Henry has a daddy. And, before he turned one year, he was blessed with another daddy. We make it work. We really do. You see, we had this novel idea: John Henry comes first. We have dinners together, and we have even vacationed together. I realize how strange my life may seem to some, but for us, it is our “normal”. Of course, a situation like ours would never work without Kris. He has never been “territorial”, nor has he ever felt threatened. He loves John Henry. Period. And, because of John Henry, he loves Bryan.
Here are his two daddies. (Left: Bryan, Right: Kris, Center: A blessed boy) They are patient and kind. They are not jealous. They endure through every circumstance.
4 Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7
9 responses to “I have two daddies.”
Dusty, I think your situation is wonderful! John Henry is very lucky to have all of this love and acceptance coming from all of you! It is a huge benefit for him! If only more children were offered this blessing!
This has always been fun to watch, I have seen something like “guess who’s coming to dinner”, “the odd couple” and “the brady bunch” played out . But on the real side of this family dynamic , it has proven that all the adults involved have been larger than the situation . I have seen selfless people stepping up and being a solid parent “team” and nothing short of a being a role model for other people represented with this set of issues! Way to go dusty, kris, and bryan for Displaying Christ in one of the most unique opputunities!
I came across your blog from BigMama’s. Your name is what caught my eye. I have a younger sis named Dusty and have never met another girl with that name.
But then when I read your blog, I thought, this may be a God thing.
I too am divorced and remarried. We have split custody and my 2 kids spend a week with us and then a week with their dad. You definitely couldn’t have this kind of arrangement without a good relationship. I don’t think we’ll ever vacation together but it works for us.
A lot of people don’t understand it but when God’s grace helps you deal with what life has done to you, it is sometimes hard to understand!
Come by for a visit sometime!
I have always thought this was amazing how the unity was there, with Kris and Bryan, Kris is the man, he is selfless, and focused, and it shows in this senario, amazing, how God has blessed your faithfulness with this love for your son, John Henry. He is experiencing how deep the love of God is, by 2 daddies in his young life! love you, good write up!
This is one of the reason I look up to you. I have not been in this situation but I ran a childcare center for 10 years and I know first hand how divorce and remarriage affects the kids. EVERYONE should act as grown up as you and your blended family do. It is shameful to watch grown adults try to “turn” the childern against the other because of the hurt that the adult feels. AMEN to you Dusty and to Bryan and Kris. John Henry will be a fantastic man because of those to men….so you should worry less about your impact on him 🙂 TEEHEE He has already got a great start. CLAP CLAP CLAP WHOO HOO CLAP CLAP…I am cheering can you tell?
Dang Dusty, I am crying. How wonderful you and Kris are!
wow, i am proud to call you a friend!
WOW. My boys have 2 daddies and although their dad and I are quite friendly, I’m certain it isn’t as beautiful a picture of God’s love as what I just read.
Pingback: Celebrate Good Times. « The Randomness of Dusty Takle