I love how the morning my article on relationships is published in The Grip and the morning after I attend a relationship class, I have a rather heated encounter with my husband. And, I don’t mean the physical touch, love language kind of encounter. I’m talking about the let’s find every wrong way to communicate to your spouse kind of encounter.
It all started with this question: “Is the bug man here?” And, yes, by bug man I mean exterminator. We are a sophisticated bunch in the Takle household.
No need in spilling every pitiful detail of how I thought Kris responded to my inquiry. Orrrr, how I received his answer. But, it would be later in the evening before we would resolve our marital dilemma.
Joey Grubbs, our relationship guru, had shared only the night before how we need to look in the mirror when we find ourselves dealing with issues in our relationships. I don’t think he meant for me to say, I don’t know, “Kris, Joey says you need to look in the mirror!” I mean, I don’t think he said that. I certainly wouldn’t have translated it that way….on a normal, non-hormonal kind of day.
Once I invited God into my day, I finally looked in the mirror for myself. What is it in me that made me receive Kris’ answer the way I received it? Why was I so offended? Later, Kris and I were able to sit down and talk about the unfortunate dialogue of that morning. I was able to share how I knew my response just wasn’t a good one. I was also able to share what I need from him in those situations. And, he was able to receive it.
I’ve always been quite the self-assessor. But, I’m learning the importance even more of looking at myself in the mirror. And, asking simple questions like, “What is it in me that makes me feel or react a certain way?” Actually, I need to look in the mirror for ALL of my relationships. Once I do, I must line up those things that aren’t right with God’s Word. Because, His Word is the best litmus test for how we are responding to and receiving from others.
So, here’s to the confessions of a writer on relationships.
I’m still growing. And, from the looks of that girl staring back at me in the mirror, I have a lot more growing to do.
Thankful for a patient husband. And, an even more patient Father.