Emptying the Tank.

Anna:  “Mom, can people live to be 160 years old?”
Me:  “I don’t think so.  It’s not the norm.”
Anna:  “Well, that’s okay.  Because, really only our bodies die.  We go to heaven and God gives us a new body.”
Me:  “You’re right.”
Anna:  “I used to be afraid to die, but I’m not afraid to die any more.”

Anna used to bring up death and cry so hard that it was nearly impossible to comfort her.  Her eyes would be swollen from weeping over the thought of losing me or her dad or the realization that she, too, will leave this earth one day.  These conversations were heart-wrenching for her in the past. 

Each day as I watch my little girl grow and gain a little more wisdom, I learn to let her tears flow at those things she doesn’t understand or skills she has a difficult time learning.  Whether its tears from struggling with her shoe laces or from not being included in a game with her brother and his friend, I’m letting those tears flow. 

 Before, I wanted to fix her immediately.  I wanted the tears to stop. 

 But, now I let the tears the flow.  Sometimes, without even asking why.  Now, I let the tough lessons in life pour out with every drop. 

 Because, it’s only when the tank is empty, that God can fill refill it with His understanding.  His truth.  His refreshing water. 

 I guess you can say, I am learning to be Anna’s mother and let God be God in her life.  I’m letting her pour out.

 So, He can pour in.

4 Comments

Filed under God Stuff, Kid Stuff, Motherhood, Spiritual Journey

4 responses to “Emptying the Tank.

  1. Susan

    This is so profound….I have learned a lesson today…love you and thank you for this wisdom.

  2. Lynn Fulop

    Wow. This is a tough one, Dusty, but so true. I often think of Garth Brook’s song about how we need to feel the pain in order to dance the dance (or something like that!). I’ve been trying to do this with my grandkids.

    Funny how at the office I allow my clients to “cry it out”, but at home I want to stop the crying. Your blog is a great reminder to be honest with our feelings, and allow others to be honest with theirs’. Love you………..

  3. Darlene

    Sweet sweet sweet. That is exactly what Anna said to me one day in class when I was talking about how my mom had died.

  4. Susan B Elliott

    Amazing…thank you for teaching me again that I don’t have to fix Katie’s tears….sometimes they just need to flow.

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