Tag Archives: parenting

September 30, 2011 · 5:00 am

Turning the Other Cheek Isn’t So Easy On the Playground.

We try to make discipleship a part of life conversations in our house.  Sometimes, we see it playing out really well.  You know, we see them practicing forgiveness, being generous, and other awesome things the Bible teaches. 

Other times, we see we need to revisit a thing or ten.

Anna:  “Mom, remember the really mean second grade boy, Shane?  He saw me on the playground today and said, ‘Well, looky here.  It’s Little Miss Anna who’s about to get her butt kicked.’”

Me:  “What did you do?”

Anna:  “I told Mrs. Walker, and she said she was already on it.”

Me:  “Good.  You handled that well.”

Anna:  “And, then I went back up to Shane and said, ‘Well, looky there.  It’s Little Mr. Shane who’s about to get his butt kicked.”

Pretty sure the whole “bless those who curse you” talk didn’t exactly run through her cute little head at that moment.

 And, to be honest, part of me wants to revisit the topic.  But, the Momma Bear part of me?  Well, that part wants to teach her a few of my karate moves.  I feel confident that’s the discipleship route her daddy would take.

I’m just sayin’.

Have a great weekend, y’all!

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August 1, 2011 · 5:00 am

One Shot.

Sometimes in the middle of raising three children, I stop and think how easy my parents had it bringing up just one.  I’m mean, it was always two adults to one child.  How hard could it have been taking me to my weekly gymnastics that I quit as soon as I started?  Just one kid.  And, a sweet, compliant one at that.  It’s my blog, I can lie if I want to.

It’s not the easiest making sure we invest into each of our children in a way we feel is “enough.”  As a matter of fact, we rarely think it’s enough.  We just trust that God has given us everything we need to accomplish everything we need to as parents.  And, we trust His grace to take care of the rest.  ‘Cause you know….I have one shot at this parenting thing.

One shot at making sure this tender heart stays tender, so he can be the face of Christ to those who need Him.

One shot at showing this smart girl how there are no limits to what her determined, fun spirit can do when it is submitted to His Spirit.

One shot at teaching this fearless, wild at heart, (sometimes spoiled) kid three that God wants to use His adventurous heart for His Kingdom. 

One shot.  That’s it. 

I don’t remember all of the extra-curricular stuff my parents made time for.  But, I do remember the life experiences they turned into discipleship opportunities.  I do remember God always being the center of every single decision.  And, I remember looking at my parents so many times and seeing what the love of Christ looks like. 

I hope that’s what my three remember.  I hope they remember Jesus in our house. 

And, maybe when they are thirty-six years old sitting around a lunch table with Kris and I, they will still be amazed at the amount of Jesus pouring from our lives. 

Just like my parents continue to amaze me.  Even if they did only have one kid.

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April 12, 2011 · 8:01 am

The Real Battle.

I spent the greater part of my morning explaining to my 8 year old why less is more when it comes to cologne.  He was concerned with the fact that I had rolled the windows down on the car ride to school, worried that his cologne would dissipate. 

Much to my chagrin (and the chagrin of his teacher, I am sure), it didn’t.

The other part of my morning was spent explaining to my 6 year old why dancing to “Wake up in the morning feeling like P Diddy” in the school talent show was not appropriate.  Perhaps, it’s the line, “brush my teeth with a bottle of Jack,” I don’t know.  And, if it takes a village to raise children, I need my village to tighten up the ship.  Or the village.  Or whatever.  In other words, I need my dad to pay more attention to the “prizes” Anna chooses when she is with him.

So, she doesn’t come home with a doll that looks like this.

Yes, those are vampire teeth and werewolf ears. 

For. The. Love.

And, to think I took a stance against Bratz dolls in our home in this post. 

We definitely choose our battles in this house.  Apparently, we don’t choose this battle:

And, the battles we fight now are not the battles we fought two years ago.  Nor, will they be the battles we fight two years from now.  But, we fight the ones that matter.  And, quite frankly, most of the battles I fight right now are my own.  The battle of choosing to make memories with my children over a clean house.  The battle of choosing the house of the Lord over a soccer game.  The battle of seeking God over my selfish desires.  Because, it’s these battles that win the hearts of my children and point them towards the One who loves them more. 

In the book of Ruth, Naomi didn’t set out to ruin her children.  But, she chose pleasure and temporary comfort over serving the King.  As a result, her children suffered. 

Choosing Him in every area of my life is really the most crucial battle in raising my children.  And, while I can rest in the fact that God redeemed Naomi’s life, I know that choosing Him today will make these child-rearing years better.  And, they will be better because of it.

It’s in fighting these battles that I enjoy moments like these. 

It’s in choosing Him that I am really choosing them.

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February 9, 2011 · 5:00 am

Reaching the Heart of My Girl.

Well.  I would love to tell you all that I have not complained.  And, perhaps, I could tell you exactly that if it weren’t for a six year old who makes Carrie Bradshaw’s wardrobe choices look ordinary.  It’s really not the fact that she wanted to wear her green and blue striped shirt with the hood under her blue and black shirt with a peace sign under her gray and pink shirt she wore the day before.  Really, it’s not.  Okay, well, the repeat of the day before shirt did get to me a little.  But, it was the time it took her to put this envious fashion statement together. 

Coupled with the fact that she completely ignored my instruction to brush her hair, her teeth, and put on socks and shoes. 

Because, no momma wants her children to be late for school.  Otherwise, she will have to park her car, and walk into the school.  With her disheveled hair.  And, scary, pasty face.  And, faded yoga pants that have never seen a day of yoga.   

So, can I be really transparent here without judgment?  K.  Thanks.

I always feel like parenting my boys is easy.  While, Anna seems to push every single button on my 5 foot 3 body.  I overuse phrases like “she wears me out.”  I find it easy to acknowledge how incredibly bright she is, but I find it difficult to appreciate the things that make her different.

And, for this?  I’m disappointed in myself as a mother.  I’m reminded of that mirror again.  So, I ask myself, “What is it in me makes me respond to my daughter the way I do?” 

Do I feel that I lose some sort of control when she chooses differently from me?

Do I feel that I will look like a bad mother if she says something that I would never say to another person? 

What is it in me?  What is keeping me from embracing her whole self? 

So, it’s back to the mirror I go.

I only have one daughter.  And, I love her with everything inside of me.  Does she feel that love?  I was wondering this very thing Monday night, so I took advantage of the Five Love Languages assessment for children. 

Anna’s primary love language?  Quality time with physical touch coming in at a close second.  I’m sure Anna loves to hear me tell her how brilliant I think she is.  But, it seems, she needs my time and my touch more than anything else.  This is how she receives love best. 

Dusty Takle needs to simmer down.  Look into the mirror.  And, then give her daughter what she needs from her. 

I need to give her what she needs now, so she will come to me later. 

And, look at the sheer fun this girl brings to the table.

Besides, I’ve heard stories of a little girl who also challenged her mother about, well, about everything.  She grew up and married a pilot and had three children of her own. 

Y’all do me a favor and remind me of this post tomorrow morning when we are getting ready for school.  And, my apologies to the neighbors for what they may or may not have heard yesterday morning. 

Selah.

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January 11, 2011 · 8:56 am

Honor.

I would have posted yesterday, but I didn’t.  I figured most of you were too consumed with sledding and hot chocolate to read some post.  As for me, nothing edible was safe in my house.  I did, however, cut my 3 Oreos with my coffee down to 2 today.  Because, I do make good choices some days.  And, being trapped inside a house with little people will really make you tune into the choices your children are making. 

I have a chalkboard hanging in the hallway in our home.  I periodically put scriptures on it, and teach them to my children.  A few days ago, Anna reminded me to change the scripture, since she was very aware that in the city of David, a Savior had already born.  So, I thought this one appropriate:

“Honor your father and mother. Then you will live a long, full life in the land the Lord your God is giving you.”  Exodus 20:12

“What does honor mean?”  Anna asked.

“It’s to treat someone with value,” I explained to her. 

My cousin was gracious to allow both John Henry and Anna spend Sunday afternoon with his little boy.  After hearing him respond to his dad with a little attitude, Anna told him what the Bible says about honoring your mother and father.  Then, she followed it up with, “if you wanna live a long life…”

Had I known Anna would take this to heart as much as she has, I would have posted that scripture a very long time ago. 

Later, Anna asked, “Will you really live a long life if you honor your parents?”

Fair question.  Especially, considering the fact that many young have left us early.  Some biblical scholars feel the promise of long life here is referring to that particular nation inhabiting that land for many days as opposed to life span.  So, I explained to Anna that this means her life would be much happier.  She would be much more content.  And, often times, a happy life affects the length of someone’s life.  It certainly affects a full life.

Yesterday, when Anna asked me what I was waiting for when she requested more Sprite, I quickly reminded her of honor.  Her dad quickly took away her privilege of getting more.  And, she quickly learned that her life, at that moment, was not full.

I think it will be a while before I erase that chalkboard.

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August 25, 2010 · 6:00 am

Necessary Supplies.

After all that talk yesterday about feeding my spirit, so my flesh will starve, I decided to read the entire New Testament again. 

I lie.  You see what happens when you don’t soak up God’s word?  You lie.  Actually, I fed my flesh a little with this new, fun creature. 

I love my husband.  Not because he gave me this iPad, which he did.  But, because he also e-mails me pics like this:

He had a few mosquito bites.  He sent me this pic of his “supplies.”  I’m just glad he didn’t go overboard.   And, I actually do understand the necessity of something such as Lifesavers Gummies. 

Anyhoo.  I actually waited until the littlest fellow went to bed, so I could give my anniversary gift my full attention.  Of course, when you are a mother of little people, it’s rare that anything ever gets your full attention.  And, my oldest two made sure it didn’t.  They both felt it was unfair that mommy got an iPad and they didn’t. 

Cry me a river. 

Well, John Henry nearly did.  On top of the fact that he doesn’t own an iPad, his sister got to sleep with me, and he didn’t.  And, the conversation that ensued is one that he will never, ever forget.  And, neither will I. 

Come back tomorrow for that one.

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August 18, 2010 · 7:06 am

It Takes A Village.

Why do I think about how much I love my children when they’re in bed asleep more than I do when they are awake and running amuck?  Well, because they are running amuck, I suppose.  After I put the three little people to bed last night, dad and I discussed in length about chasing after God through worship, which has nothing to do with this post, really.  So, AFTER dad and I had our little Jesus talk, he went home, and I went to bed and thought about what I’m doing to fulfill my mission for my family:  raising my children to be fully devoted followers of Christ.  I try to be very intentional in talking with my children about who God is in their life.  They ask a lot of questions now about the things of God. 

Especially, Anna.  Of course, she asks a lot of questions about everything and is generally disappointed in my lack of knowledge on the snake species.  She has also requested a “snake party” for her birthday.  John Henry told her if she has snakes at her party, then he isn’t coming.  She responded with, “Well, I won’t invite you, then.”  Fair enough.  She’s also asked for camouflage apparel for deer hunting season.  The vogue in me shouts, “Stop this madness!”  I blame Kris.  He is not exactly burning holes on the fashion runways. 

Questions.  So, Anna asked, “Okay, there is the Holy Spirit….and who are the other two?”  I’ve decided to let dad explain the trinity to her.  Because, I failed miserably in trying to explain it to my husband. 

I look to other lovers of Jesus to partner with me in raising my children to become devoted followers of Christ.  And, I look to Mrs. Darlene, her Sunday School teacher, to work out the kinks in her response to learning that Esther was a queen:  “I don’t like princesses.  Not Ariel.  Not any of them.” 

This is why the body of Christ is so important.  I really wouldn’t want to do life without them.  And, fulfilling my family mission would be a lot harder to do alone.  So, I work hard to make sure my kids don’t miss a Sunday at church.  And, I work hard to make sure I don’t miss out on life experiences to disciple them. 

It takes a village, people.

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August 13, 2010 · 8:25 am

My Mini Me.

She was so excited when her Far-Far (Kris’ dad) gave her this bathrobe.  And, for those wondering, Far Far is Norwegian for “father’s father.”  My kids pronounce it Fa-Fa.  It works for us. 

She was excited, because she had a robe to put on after she showers just like me.  And, she wants me to wrap her hair in a towel.  Just like I do. 

She’ll put on her Converse sneakers and then ask me to wear mine. 

She will play with my jewelry and ask, “Mom, can I have these when I am bigger?” 

She wants to grow out her bangs and part her hair just like mine.

She loves my things.  She loves it when we are alike. 

She watches me, and she wants to be like me.  Of course, she is still very much one unique Anna Takle.

I want her to see fully who I am.  Flaws and all.  I want her to see that when I struggle with insecurity, I find my security in Christ.  I want her to see that when I mess up big and small, I pray to a God of mercy who is quick to forgive.  I want her to see that when I begin to worry, I stand on what God has already promised me in His word.  I want her to see that when I am in need, I call on friends who love Christ as much as I do. 

Chances are…

If she watches me build my life on these things, then she will do just the same. 

So, it’s good for me to ask myself:   What is she seeing when she watches me?

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August 12, 2010 · 5:00 am

Don’t Close Up Shop.

I can let life swallow me up.  I can.  I can allow the activities and antics of three children cause me to close up shop on sharing my gifts with others.  Serving others.  Because, it seems like too much at that moment.

But, it’s not always too much.  It’s not usually as stressful as we make it out to be.  It’s just our response to those busy moments that mess with our head.  Okay, maybe it’s just my head.  Maybe, it’s just me? 

I almost let one of those moments make me close up shop yesterday afternoon.  My sweet husband had a dinner meeting with airplane-ish type folk.  I had household obligations, two children with obligations, and an infant who, well, was only obligated to let me know when he was hungry.  And, he was.  Of course, he was.   Have you seen him?  Only the cutest chunk of love in the history of chunks of love. 

You see?  I do not lie, friends.

It would have been easier to let these things – life things – consume me.  Stay home.  Pretend there was nothing or no one else besides myself and my three little people.  It really would have.  But, one thing I’ve learned (and my parents have taught me) in my thirty-five plus years on planet earth is this:

My life will be more blessed when I live beyond myself. 

Beyond me.  Beyond my kids’ homework and schedules.  Beyond the constant needs of an infant.  Beyond making sure I’ve emptied the dishwasher.  Beyond getting my hair ministered to – which by the power of the Holy Spirit, I was able to fit that in.  Can I get an amen on coverin’ them roots? 

I was responsible for teaching the youth last night.  And, for some dadgum reason, I can’t say “youth” without thinking of My Cousin Vinny.  You know the line.  “Your honor, two utes.”  I seriously can’t.  I drive myself crazy sayin’ it.  ANY. HOW.

By choosing to overcome any stress that parenting, sans my awesome husband, brings, I used one of my gifts.  More than that, I just served.  And, instead of staying home, putting my children to bed, and contemplating how hectic my day was….

I put my children to bed, and then I went to bed fulfilled.  Content.  Happy.  Blessed.

I think that’s what Paul meant in Acts 20 when he said, “it’s more blessed to give than to receive.” 

But, don’t get me wrong.  If any of y’all wanna come keep three little people and send me to the spa, I will not make you withhold those good gifts.  You know.  Since that would bless y’all and all.

Ahem.

I mean, Amen.

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August 9, 2010 · 5:00 am

It’s For Them, Too.

Jett looks like he is wondering what kind of family he’s been placed into. 

A fun one.

Seriously. 

We are all pretty hysterical.  Or, at least, that’s the world we choose to believe we live in.

I love these children.  “Well of course, you do.  You’re their mother!”  I worry about these children.  I question my parenting.  I get on my knees and seek God for their lives.  I remind myself that if I could meet their every need, they wouldn’t need a Savior. 

But, when I read scripture, I honestly forget about it applying to my children’s lives.  Is that crazy or what?

“I will never leave you or forsake you…”  (Heb. 13:5) That’s for my kids.

“I will supply your every need….” (Phil.4:19)  That’s for them, too.

“My help comes from the Lord…” (Psalm 121.2)  For them.

“You are my Portion….” (Psalm 119) Forrrrr them.

I could go on and on.  And on.  I can’t meet their every need.  But God can.  And, He wants to. 

But, I can teach them to seek first His Kingdom, so all of those things can be given to them.  I can teach them to put on the full of armor of God so they can stand up to anything.  I can teach them to chase after God’s will more than their own.  I can teach them to love God with all of their heart, soul, mind, and strength.

It’s in HIM and through HIM that they will have EVERYTHING they need.  They will never lack.  Because, THEY serve the Creator of the universe.

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