Tag Archives: parenting

August 3, 2010 · 5:00 am

A Life of Worship

The storm knocked out our cable and wireless for a wonderful couple of hours.  I placed the iPod on the docking station, held baby boy, and listened to the big kids sing along to worship song after worship song.  I looked up and saw John Henry raising his hands and closing his eyes. 

“Mom, I’m worshipping God right now, since I wasn’t at church Sunday,” he told me.

“You can worship God any time you want,” I assured him.

And, we did just that.  Tears flooded my eyes as I worshipped the Creator with my children.  Then, we talked about worship. 

“What is worship, Anna?”

“It’s something we send to God,” she answered.

Something we send to Him.  It’s not something we just do on Sunday.  It’s a life lived.  A life lived that brings glory to Him.  A life that honors Him.

A life that gives.

That blesses.

That seeks His Kingdom first.

That chases after God.

Everybody worships something.  But, we were made to worship Him.

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you.  Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable.  This is truly the way to worship him.  Romans 12:1

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April 28, 2010 · 6:00 am

Shhh…

That’s what I’d tell your right this second if you walked into my house. It’s 9:43pm on the bottom right of my computer screen.  Jett is in bed making little grunty noises.  I hear an occasional whimper.  I go into his room to soothe him.  Um, like now….hold up.

Okay.  I’m back, and now it’s 9:46pm.  We are doing the whole “lay him down awake” technique in hopes that this little man will learn to fall asleep on his own.  In the meantime, I sit up in my soft, living room chair and pass the time reading, writing, and wondering how in the world I can give my older two children the attention they need from me while caring for this little person who can do practically nothing for himself.

So, I feel guilt.  I feel guilty that I have to tell my son, “Buddy, I can’t right now.”  I feel guilty that by the time I made it to my daughter’s room to pray for her tonight, she was already asleep.  I know this only a season.  And, I wouldn’t skip this season if I could.  But I wish I could press a pause button sometimes, so I didn’t miss any moments with any of my children. 

And, John Henry and Anna are both so gracious to me.  They are gracious to their new little brother.  I hear John Henry singing Jeremy Camp’s “Beautiful One” to his little brother.  I see Anna brushing his cheeks with her hand and trying to make him smile.  Of course this afternoon, Kris and I overheard her telling him about Jesus and God.  How they live in heaven.  How we’ll all die one day and live in heaven, too.  Poor kid just got here, and already Anna is preparing him for the sweet by and by. 

Nonetheless, they have been gracious.  And, I can’t help but think that God has given them grace for this season, too. 

Do you ever feel guilt as a parent?

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April 26, 2010 · 6:00 am

The Secret of Her Success.

My young athlete scored 8 of her team’s 11 goals at Saturday’s soccer game.  She told her Nan,

“I just turned on my speed and asked God to help me.  But, don’t tell the green team.”

When I later asked Anna if she prayed to ask God to help her, she responded, “No, I didn’t pray, I just asked Him.” 

This is where her knowledge of God becomes relational.  Where talking to Him becomes second nature.  And, that makes a momma’s heart happy.

Except for when she shouted, “We win!  They lose!” 

Today’s Parenting Lesson:  Humility.

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February 22, 2010 · 6:00 am

It’s Girls’ Night Out.

Actually, it was Girls’ Day Out.  Y’all know I can’t stay out past 5:00 these days.  Momma gets tie-red.  Kris and I are trying to squeeze in some one on one time with our kiddos before their little brother gets here and consumes a lot of it.  So, Anna and I, well, Anna planned our Girls’ Day Out day.  And, John Henry and Kris had a Boys’ Afternoon Out.  I only have one picture of Kris and John Henry’s time together.  Boys just don’t take pictures like us girls do.

The boys went to Laser Quest to play laser tag, of course.  Kris came home quite enthused and insisted that he and I go back together after Jett is born.  Absolutely, that is the destination I was thinking.  It’s like we are constantly thinking the same thoughts.  Weird.

They left Laser Quest and picked up pizza to enjoy with an evening of Darth of Vader finally telling Luke, “I am your father!”  They had fun.  And, good conversation – the really added bonus of it all.

Anna knew exactly what our day should like from start to finish. 

Nothing begins a Girls’ Day Out quite like the short stack at Jimmy’s Egg.  We drive by Jimmy’s Egg daily.  And, daily I hear, “Momma, let’s go to Jimmy’s Egg!”  She got her wish.  Along with the next three hours spent at the Paint ‘N Station.

Yes.  THREE HOURS.  I had so much time on my hands, that I painted this little Easter platter using Anna’s handprint.  I’m hoping that once it’s fired, it’ll look a bit more presentable.  Anna could pick out ANYTHING in the store to paint.  Of all the options, she picked a sugar dish.  Because, every little girl dreams of having her own sugar dish.  I think I was so delirious from paint fumes or waiting THREE HOURS for her to finish that I just clearly forgot to take a picture of her finished product. 

We finished up at McDonald’s for ice cream.

It was not an unusually warm day in Oklahoma.  A tank top was just her attire of choice.  It was Girls’ Day, after all.

Kris and John Henry closed the weekend building John Henry’s Pinewood Derby car for Cub Scouts. 

Thank the good Lord Kris was around to help cut out this baby.  The only thing I can cut from a block of wood is…. 

Hmmm.  Well, I don’t think I can cut anything from a block of wood.

So, I’ll stick with pancakes, painting, and ice cream.  I am accomplished at eating.  That is for certain.

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February 12, 2010 · 6:00 am

Her Ability To Make Me Laugh Is Often Redemptive.

I told her the brown leggings with the peach flowers looked hideous with her shirt.  She disagreed.  I told her to change pants.  She did.

Sort of.

So, when I picked her up from school, how in the name of all things Vogue, did she manage to have on the brown leggings again? 

Because, she wore them under the pants that won my stamp of approval. 

“Besides,” she said, “My teacher liked them.”

Any and all advice on raising a strong-willed little girl is appreciated.  As are prayers.  And boxes of chocolate.  And a vacation for two to the Caribbean. 

But, I do have hope.  You see, I was a very similar five-year old.  And, my mom still loves me today.

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February 5, 2010 · 6:00 am

Confessions Made Easy.

Confession is hard.  Especially when you’re five.  But, this time, I made it easy when I found old, dried grapes in our hallway coat closet.  Yes.  Grapes. 

Me:  Who put grapes in the closet?

John Henry:  It wasn’t me!

Me:  Anna?

Anna:  It wasn’t me!

Me:  Anna, just tell me now.  Did you put grapes in the closet?

Anna:  Hmmm.  Are you gonna be mad?

Me:  No.

Anna:  Am I gonna be in trouble?

Me:  (Smiling) No.

Anna:  Okayyy.  It was me.

I didn’t even want to know why.

Sometimes, our kids just need a break.  They need, well, the unmerited favor of their mom and dad, too. 

So, she got it. 

Do you need to show a little more mercy sometimes?

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February 4, 2010 · 6:00 am

The Kindness of A Father.

We’ve been studying/discussing the fruit of the Spirit in my most awesome Bible Study.  Today, I think we all wept over this one:  Kindness. 

Specifically – the kindness of our Heavenly Father.  I may share more on this later.  But, one quote by Beth Moore grabbed my attention in a big way:

“We will never be successful as parents to our children until we are successful at being children to our Heavenly Father.”

Every single thing we could ever want or need from our earthly father, our Heavenly Father provides.  We want time with our father.  God says “draw near to me, and I’ll draw near to you.”  We long to be special to our father.  God tells us we are “wonderfully and fearfully made.”  We want to know our father will always be there.  God says he will “never leave you nor forsake you.” 

I could go on and on.  He loves us.  His kindness amazes me.  Even though, He may correct or reprove us, His kindness is like no other.  I want that kind of kindness. 

I want that kind of kindness when I parent my own children. 

If I want to learn to be a good mother to my children, I think I need to pay closer attention to how my Heavenly Father loves me.

How do you respond to Christ as your Father?  Do you even know Him as a Father?

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February 3, 2010 · 6:00 am

Oh, But For the Grace

What is God’s grace?  A shortened version:  It’s God’s unmerited favor.  Often times God’s grace is confused with God’s mercy.  It’s by God’s mercy that I don’t really get all that I deserve.  But, it’s God’s grace that we can draw from when we go through difficult times.

Oswald Chambers writes:

The grace you had yesterday will not be sufficient for today. Grace is the overflowing favor of God, and you can always count on it being available to draw upon as needed. “. . . in much patience, in tribulations, in needs, in distresses”— that is where our patience is tested ( 2 Corinthians 6:4 ). Are you failing to rely on the grace of God there? Are you saying to yourself, “Oh well, I won’t count this time”? It is not a question of praying and asking God to help you— it is taking the grace of God now. We tend to make prayer the preparation for our service, yet it is never that in the Bible. Prayer is the practice of drawing on the grace of God. Don’t say, “I will endure this until I can get away and pray.” Pray now — draw on the grace of God in your moment of need. Prayer is the most normal and useful thing; it is not simply a reflex action of your devotion to God. We are very slow to learn to draw on God’s grace through prayer.

“To draw upon as needed….”  The measure of grace God gives someone who just lost their child is much greater than the measure of grace I might need for a financial struggle.  But, His grace is always sufficient.  No matter what situation we are in.  We just have to draw on it.

Kris and I were talking about how our life is going to change when Jett arrives.  How am I going to deal with the stresses of a newborn, two kids in school, and being so far away from my momma?  Then, I remembered when John Henry was born.

I was a single mother.  I was the only one getting up in the middle of the night with him.  I was the only one clothing him, bathing him, and feeding him.  By the time he was six weeks old, I was back at work.  I would get him up in the mornings, get him dressed and fed, and put him in his little bouncy seat.  I’d put that bouncy seat in my bathroom while I showered and got ready for work.   Then, off we’d go.

I don’t remember any moments where I was ready to pull my hair out.  I do remember an overwhelming peace in our little home.  I remember a sweet baby boy who began sleeping through the night early.  I remember not wanting to go out for New Year’s Eve, because I just wanted to spend the evening with him. 

What was it that made our first few months alone together so peaceful?  So wonderful?

I’m pretty sure it was God’s grace on my life.  I never stopped crying out to Him.  I never stopped praying that God would make something great of my disappointment in life – my divorce. 

He did.  He was faithful.  And, in the meantime of going through it all, His grace was sufficient. 

Sometimes, I forget to draw on that grace today.  That unmerited favor of God.  So, He reminds me of how His grace was sufficient when…..

And when……

And when…..

And, then?  I count my stones.

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January 13, 2010 · 6:00 am

Checks And Balances.

Some may think this picture is the result of fine parenting.  Most can probably figure out it’s the product of a good photographer.  Thankyousokindly, Janna Goodwin.

I have days where I, well, I pretty much rock as their mother.  Then, I have days where I fail them.

I don’t like those days.  I think yesterday was one of those days.  I’m a tad hormonal.  I mean, just a tad.  Recently, I have the tendency of being a little short with them.  And, I’m not talkin’ ‘bout my height.  I love God.  I love studying His Word.  I’m finding that this whole asking God to stretch me in ministry thing is a little more than I may have bargained for.  And, in this process of loving, growing, and stretching, I have noticed a few times where I put that in front of my children.

And, God’s not in that.  Because, they are my greatest mission field.  They shouldn’t have to compete with other things that can sometimes consume my life.  Sure, there will be times when those other things will need immediate attention.  There will be times where they cannot have 100 percent of my attention.  There will be times.  It’s finding that balance that’s important.  And, there have been a few days recently where I haven’t achieved that balance.  Not well. 

So, today, I’m going to ask them to forgive me.  They will.  Then, perhaps, today, I’ll rock as their mom again – sans the awesome dance moves that embarrass John Henry and time consumed on Anna’s microphone; because, clearly, any and all time on the mic belongs Anna Takle.

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January 5, 2010 · 6:00 am

Careful What You Say. What You Write. What You Type.

I’m pretty sure I’ve written on this topic before.  After talking to a friend about a text message her daughter received, I felt compelled to write about it again. 

When I was around 10 or 11 years old, I sat down and wrote a letter to a girl who was a few years older than me.  It was an ugly letter.  I was upset with her for seemingly taking away my best friend.  I said things like, “You think you’re it.  You’re not.” 

The letter never reached her hands.  My parents found it first.  Thankfully.  Let’s say they were less than happy.  A lot less. 

They sat me down and read the letter to me.  I can remember my dad using the word “arrogant” to describe my character in writing that.  They addressed my spiritual life.  They addressed my character.  They addressed it all. 

You see, my parents cared about how I treated other people – regardless, of how they treated me.  And, revenge is another post I plan on sharing soon.

Fast forward to 2010.  My friend shares with me how her daughter received a very demeaning text message.  She was asked to forward that text to others.  She didn’t.  Her mother saw it first.  But so many parents today turn a blind eye to, or even worse, join in with the cruel words their children and teenagers communicate to others. 

They write ugly messages on someone else’s Myspace page or Facebook wall.  They send nasty text messages.  They leave behind them a path of destruction for that victim to walk through. 

And, it’s grossly wrong. 

We as parents must be more concerned with our children’s character and spiritual growth than we are with their talents in school or sports.  We must be aware of the words coming out of their mouths and being typed by their fingers. 

We simply must.

The girl I wrote that letter to would commit suicide a few years later. 

So thankful I didn’t leave her in my path of destruction.  And, thankful I had parents who cared about my character.

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